American Idol

Let me start by qualifying myself as not a fan of American Idol, which I see as a significant contributing factor to the blanding and de-classing of American pop culture, but I do love the first few episodes of each season as the judges grind through the regional auditions for the awesome parade of proudly-flown freak flags.

And I know I'm not alone. American Idol drew 30.1 million viewers last night to the freak parade. It will be intersting to see what kind of viewership main-contest shows draw as well as the finals, as I suspect there are a few folks like myself that get bored with the true 'talent' and fail to stick around.

For now, in honor of all of American Idol's early wannabes, I wanted to revisit Trista Giese from a few seasons back as perhaps my all-time favorite for a misguided attempt at the Lion from the Wizard of OZ that comes closer to channeling Chewbacca doing wookie lullabies via grunt and purr.



Last night we saw some true champions in the freak-flag tradition and one particularly surprising in that she got passed on 'to Hollywood': Katrina Darrell aka "American Idol Bikini Girl." This one has to be stopped. For all that is good and Holy, she cannot be successful in this campaign.

Ryan Seacrest was typically awkward throughout, missing a high-five attempt with the blind guy (who could not be denied under the Americans with Disabilities Act) and visibly squirming under the salivacious overtures of Bikini Girl.

Finally, something has to be said about Simon Cowell's haircut. Jesus guy. You're rich, stop going to Supercuts!